told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Randomize
