When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
