new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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