Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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