Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
farters have to be the big spoon...
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Randomize
