i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
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