Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
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