I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
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