that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
