I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
