Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
