eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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