when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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