Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
