Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
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