Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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