sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
