i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Randomize
