youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
