How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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