Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize
