If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
