Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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