bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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