Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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