Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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