I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
