I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
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