My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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