oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
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