if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
