Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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