I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
