Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
