I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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