And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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