4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Damn victory sex feels great
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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