I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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