i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
