I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
