Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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