omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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