i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
You dont lie about slip and slides
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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