nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize