im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
