maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
