we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
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