Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
