Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
