I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
