I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
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